Now on sale at Amazon.com. Click on the book cover to read more.

PLYMOUTH, MA…

Blended families have become more and more the norm. With that, many men take on the mantle of “stepfather” merely by saying “I do”—a daunting task if you have your own children, even more so if it means becoming an instant parent. While there’s an initial honeymoon period for blended families, there are traps new stepfathers can avoid to keep the family that is blended, splendid.

“I was 40 when I first got married. I had a pretty close relationship with my six nieces and nephews and got on extremely well with my now wife’s two kids, but getting married was a whole new ballgame,” said Joe D’Eramo, author of 25 Ways to go from Stepfather to StepDad. “What stepfathers have to realize is as big of a transition as this is for them, it’s bigger for the kids. So, you have to tread gently and avoid some common traps.”

According to D’Eramo, stepfathers can make the transition smoother by following a few basic guidelines in their approach. Those include:

• Get over yourself – It’s human nature for stepfathers to think “I took on the raising of somebody else’s kids” and that some sort of congratulations is in order. Get over yourself. You can’t raise children thinking they owe you a debt of gratitude for marrying their mother.
• Overcompensating – It’s really not your job to make up for the shortcomings of the biological father and be “Super Dad”. You are a co-parent and have a very important role. Do what you do and don’t worry about what you think your children’s biological father should be doing.
• Follow your wife’s lead on house rules – There’s enough change when a stepfather moves in. Don’t try to reinvent the rules of the house right away. If the kids go to bed at 8, then they continue to go to bed at 8. Children of divorce have enough difficulty following the rules at two homes if they visit their biological father. Don’t make them learn two sets of rules at home. Think of your wife as the CEO of rules as they apply to the children and you are her closest and trusted advisor.
• Bad mouthing their father – It should go without saying, but many stepfathers fall into the trap of badmouthing and complaining about the biological father in front of the kids. Just don’t do it. While more than a few fathers drop the ball, you only tarnish how they view you by saying bad things about their father.
• Do not allow the children to disrespect their father – Conversely, it’s not uncommon for your stepchildren to want to vent about their father. You can let them up to a certain degree. If it becomes disrespectful, jump in and put a stop to it. Again, they may be justified in their complaints but you still want your children to respect all grownups. Let them vent until it crosses a line.
• Be a parent not a pal – Perhaps the biggest mistake a stepfather can make is trying to be a buddy instead of a parent. Letting them stay up late, playing video games, letting them eat junk food and other things of that ilk may earn you a pall for the night. It won’t help when you’re trying to get them to take out the trash or do their homework. Children of divorce may not like it, but they crave structure. That’s something a parent does, not a buddy. Remember, they won’t say it, but they are counting on you for that structure.

Plymouth, Mass.-resident and step-parent of two Joe D’Eramo recently published a new e-book, 25 Ways to go from Stepfather to StepDad, to offers some helpful suggestions for soon-to-be or newly married men who are becoming husbands and fathers for the first time.

“When it comes to parenting, there really are no experts and all we have to go on is our experiences,” said D’Eramo, “What stepfathers need to remember that you, your wife and your stepchildren are all in this thing together. None of you have done it before. So don’t be afraid to talk as a family and ask for help. It’s amazing how many of those conversations have kept situations from escalating and further developed the relationships in the family.”

25 Ways to go from Stepfather to StepDad sells for $9.95 on Amazon as a Kindle book (Kindle also offers a free app that enables customers to read e-books on their PC). You can read more about the book and tips for stepfathers on the 25 Ways to go from Stepfather to StepDad Facebook page, http://www.facebook.com/mystepdad.

About HiRoad Communications:

Based in Plymouth, Massachusetts, HiRoad Communications is owned by freelance copywriter Joe D’Eramo. HiRoad generates copy for web content, marketing communications materials, PR pieces, articles, blogs, social media sites and more. For more information, visit www.hiroadcommunications.com or call 617-848-0848.

StepDad knows best. Plymouth, MA resident Joe D’Eramo authors “25 Ways to go from Stepfather to StepDad”.

DATELINE: PLYMOUTH, MA…

With blended families becoming more and more the norm, saying “I do” for many single men means becoming a husband and a father as well. Instantly. Plymouth, Mass.-resident and step-parent of two Joe D’Eramo recently published a new e-book, 25 Ways to go from Stepfather to StepDad, to offers some helpful suggestions for soon-to-be or newly married men who are becoming husbands and fathers for the first time.

“I was 40 when I first got married. I had a pretty close relationship with my six nieces and nephews and got on extremely well with my now wife’s two kids, getting married was a whole new ballgame,” said D’Eramo, a freelance copywriter. “The book talks about some of the things I did to smooth that transition, some of the things I wish I’d done, and some of the things I still work at.”

25 Ways to go from Stepfather to StepDad sells for $9.95 on Amazon as a Kindle book (Kindle also offers a free app that enables customers to read e-books on their PC).

Some of the topics and chapters in 25 Ways to go from Stepfather to StepDad include:

• Following your spouse’s parenting lead.
• Dealing with her ex.
• “No, I’m his step…”
• “Dad’s Day”
• “Grandma/Grandpa? Nana/Papa? Sir or Ma’am?”
• “It’s your turn, Coach.”
• “StepDad! Pick up!”
• “Respect all the parents”
• “In-laws as allies”
• “Hers and ours…Starting your own family”

All of the material covered in the book is based on D’Eramo’s experiences helping to raise his two stepchildren, a task that took on another dimension with the birth of his daughter nearly six years ago. 

“She’s just about the age when I met our son. It’s been kind of nice to see the movie from the beginning with this child, but it’s given me an entire new perspective on how my wife raised the older two as a single parent,” said D’Eramo. “With this book, I wanted to let other soon-to-be stepfather or current ones know you are not alone.”

Adds D’Eramo, “Not that I’ve mastered the art of parenting. Far from it. I don’t have a Ph.D. in anything. I’m a just a regular guy who embraced the challenge of being a stepfather and was rewarded with the most fulfilling experience of my life.”

In addition to 25 Ways to go from Stepfather to StepDad, D’Eramo, a Framingham State University graduate, also penned Recipes for the Roommate-Impaired, available on Amazon.com as a paperback.

Visit the 25 Ways to go from Stepfather to StepDad Facebook page, https://www.facebook.com/pages/25-Ways-to-go-from-Stepfather-to-StepDad/262404817174765, for more information.

About HiRoad Communications:

Based in Plymouth, Massachusetts, HiRoad Communications is owned by freelance copywriter Joe D’Eramo. HiRoad generates copy for web content, marketing communications materials, PR pieces, articles, blogs, social media sites and more. For more information, visit www.hiroadcommunications.com or call 617-848-0848.

The “it” referred to here is adding new content to your website (let’s keep it out of the gutter, people).

When it comes to our websites, the fundamental complaint business owners have is not ranking high enough in the search engines. While
there’s the entire science of having the right keyword or keyword phrases, adding new content on on a fairly regular basis remains a critical part of higher rankings. Yet how many actually do it–add new content–each week?

Search engines only see words. Once a site has been indexed, it receives its ranking. If other website owners–new and those with existing sites–add new content with those same keywords, they can leave you in the dust.

That’s why having a blog that’s built into your website–not on separate blog sites–is critical to sustaining your search engine ranking. By simply posting a blog entry with your select choice of keywords, you are sending a message to the search engine spiders to “reindex me” with that new content. That helps keep your site from going to the bottom of the list.

So, how do you manage to do it at least once a week (shame on you if you haven’t caught on by now)? Here are some easy ways to consistently have fresh content:

• Hire a freelance article/blog writer like yours truly to draft a month’s worth of blogs.
• Make it a priority for you or a dedicated member of your staff to add content at least once a week.
• Recruit guest bloggers. Invite non-competitors who have a similar target audience contribute a blog to run on your site. You can return the favor by writing one for theirs. If you work this right, you can be writing one blog a month but have new content every week and reach additional audiences.
• Reference articles and link to them. That’s not advocating publishing an article verbatim on your blog. But a paragraph describing the article and then linking to it is fine.

Companies spend thousands of dollars in establishing a web presence. Yet it’s amazing how many forget to put that same effort on an
ongoing basis by updating the content to ensure the success of the site. By “doing it” once a week (or more), you can keep your website current and virile.

The perfect e-newsletter features a smoking subject line that demands, not asks, that you open the e-mail.

The design and layout looks like a piece of art. Subtle and sophisticated, it complements the words on the page beautifully.

The first headline fastens you to your seat like a nail gun at close range.

The articles suck you in and command you to call, click or e-mail, credit card or checkbook in hand.

The perfect e-newsletter.

And you know how many people will read that perfect e-newsletter?

That depends on one key factor: -whether or not you actually sent it.

It’s a trap that many small business owners fall into. You want your e-newsletter to be perfect. What happens is you sweat the tiniest details and then get caught up in the other many details of your business. Consequently, you miss an easy opportunity to consistently stay front-of-mind with customers/clients, prospects and, probably most importantly, your network.

One of the many beauties of the Internet age is the ease in which you can evolve your marketing materials with very little associated costs. A website, for example, is never truly finished because you should always be adding content. It’s the same for an e-newsletter. You put out your best effort and then keep tweaking to make the next effort even better.

Will it cost you business if you put out an e-newsletter that not done particularly well? Maybe.  Will it cost you business if you do
nothing and you don’t maintain consistent contact with your target audience? Most definitely. And that’s the true price of perfection.

On the flip side, it does illustrate a point that yours truly has tried to hammer home with clients and potential clients for years. You
must treat your subject line as your headline. If you do not give the reader a reason to open it, he or she will not. It’s just the nature of people these days. We only have a certain amount of time and if there doesn’t appear to be any news of interest in an e-mail, then we move on.

That’s not saying you have to resort to trickery and fancy word play to get people to open and read your e-newsletter. That typically
works only once and then you risk losing your readers forever. But you do have to deliver a punchy headline that scratches an itch or piques their curiosity-then deliver the goods in the newsletter.

The shame is that many e-newsletters do have a worthwhile message that can benefit the reader in some way-new product, new
service, tip on how to do something more cost-effectively. Then they essentially throw it away with a subject line like “News from …”.

You’re probably saying “Joe, you’re just trying to justify people hiring copywriters to do their newsletters.” My answer, “you’re darn right I am!” But the greater point, whether you hire a writer to do it or not, is that you should put as much thought if not more into your subject line as you do the introductory paragraph of the newsletter. It doesn’t even have to be the most creative headline of all time. Just tell them why they should open your e-mail and you’d be surprised how open rates will rise. And that’s a whole lot easier than finding an obituary with your name on it.

As for Dad, don’t worry about him. He eventually embraced the fax machine, cell phone and e-mail. Social media won’t be too far behind and he’ll be “Liking” his only son someday soon.

Coach DQ

Career Life Coach Dawn Quesnel, AKA Coach DQ, Quesnel is a professionally certified coach and an accredited member of the International Coach Federation (she recently received “Coach of the Year” honors from that organization’s New England chapter). In addition to coaching clients, Coach DQ frequently appears on local and national media outlets, including ABC-TV, FOX-TV, WGBH-TV, NYC Neighborhood TV Network, Disney Radio and Blog-Talk Radio. She most recently penned a chapter for SelfGrowth.com Founder David Riklan’s new book, “101 Great Ways to Enhance Your Career”.

How long have you been using Constant Contact?

DQ:  Since 2004.

What Constant Contact products do you use?

DQ: I’ve used e-mail marketing and their survey product. 

What do you use it for?

DQ: To keep in touch with clients, associates, friends and family. 

What do you like about it?

DQ: It’s easy to use.

What’s been your biggest challenge in using Constant Contact?

DQ: Getting around spam filters

How successful has Constant Contact been in helping you grow your business?

DQ: Very helpful!  I love getting those e-mails saying, I’ve been on your e-zine for years and I’m ready to set up a coaching consult with you.

If you could cite one reason why companies, small business owners and organizations should use Constant Contact, what would it be?

DQ: It’s a great way to keep in communication with customers and clients.

Recently, yours truly wrote a press release for a PR Works client, Haley’s Tire & Service Center, with four locations in Maine. The owner, Tim Haley, was diagnosed two years ago with Stage IV colon cancer. After several operations and treatments, he received the go-ahead from doctors to participate in the Pan Mass Challenge, the 192-mile bike ride from Sturbridge to Provincetown to raise money for the Jimmy Fund. Haley raised $25,000!

This year, Tim is cancer-free and participating in the 2011 PMC. In working with Tim on a PR campaign for his four stores, we asked how he felt about using his story to promote his business. He wasn’t sure and asked a legitimate question, “wouldn’t it be exploiting his condition just to benefit his business?”

Not really and it goes back to the original point: people want to like who they do business with. Even more, they want to be inspired. If your business makes contributions to specific charities or you do volunteer work for certain causes and you use that as part of your marketing and PR, it is inspiring. Far from cheapening that effort, it brings attention to the cause, perhaps even making others want to contribute or volunteer.

Most of all, if you’re a small business owner and the face of your company, who you are and what you do in the community does impact your business. People will still make their buying decisions based on what fits their needs. But if there’s a chance for them to do business with somebody they like or admire for their efforts in the community or somebody they really don’t know, it doesn’t take a brain surgeon to know who will get their business. So why keep who you are and what you do secret?

Tim Haley didn’t’ and thank goodness.

An inspiring story is worth telling and certainly worth hearing. To read Tim’s story, here’s the articlethat appeared in the Portland Press Herald. If you would like to make a  contribution to Tim’s Team Headstrong, go to  www.pmc.org, click on the logo at the top left, and enter Tim’s EGIFT ID TH0130. All major credit cards are accepted. ]]> http://www.hiroadcommunications.com/why-business-is-personal/feed 0